Rape Culture (At It's Worst)
I though after watching and reviewing the Surviving R. Kelly specials, I made my point. Then, I heard the story of Jasmine Eiland (Say Her Name). A woman from East St. Louis who got raped in an Atlanta night club after getting her drink spiked. Now stop me if you heard this one (and I am quite serious). Despite the rape taking place on Facebook Live and she was obviously in and out of consciousness, many of you out there want to say she's making it up because you saw her twerking and smiling.
I don't understand why you don't think someone could be drugged and raped. This date rape drug causes you to lose control of your whole body. You have no control over what you say or do. You don't understand when Ms. Eiland was under the control of this drug, yes she was smiling and twerking but she also had no idea of what was going on around her. Yeah, you can jump on her after the fact and tell her how she's wrong for "allowing her drink to get spiked" but it's easier said than done and quite easier to judge.
What upsets me is, I heard all sides of the coin. I heard Eiland's side, I heard the alleged rapist's side, I even heard some of your side of the coin. Many of you yet again, saw her twerking and having a good time and assumed she wanted the sexual activity not knowing that, she was not in the right frame of mind to consent. The law says if she isn't in the right frame of mind to consent then you can't have sex with her. It's rape.
After watching "Surviving R. Kelly" I heard many of you saying it's about the money. Many of them allegedly lied because R. Kelly was a superstar. Using that reasoning, you all wanted to put that on Ms. Eiland. My question is what does Ms. Eiland have to gain from falsely accusing someone. She doesn't know whether the assailant had money or not. Even if you think she did, she still have nothing to gain We truly need to stop this blaming the victim culture.
One of my friends who had something put in her drink and realized it which signaled her to an issue before things got worse.
Lucy L. recounts her events. "Years and years ago someone put something in my drink - IMMEDIATELY I felt weird and called a friend to come get me!! Thank God he came to my rescue and I was smart enough to stop drinking. First of all it tasted different and I felt my body feel crazy so I immediately put the drink down after like 2 drinks of it. I couldn’t drive - I had to sit and drink tons of water to flush it out my system!! From that day forward I NEVER accept drinks from anyone I don’t know personally!! So sad!!!"
Fortunately she was with people who kept her safe. The same instance in another friend of mine who was able to escape her assailant before things went too far.
"When i was.19 this guy i went on a date with laced the weed with something. We were at Calico's when i really started feeling bad. When he asked what was wrong I told him i didn't feel right. He suggested going to a room he got.
"After he said that i walked out of the restaurant then he walked after me then the staff walks after all.of us because our food wasn't paid for. While he argued with them I ran to the metro link station and called my cousin who met me at the next station. I swear it took days for whatever that was to get out of my system."
Those were two situations that could have turned tragic if the women weren't able to escape. Ms. Eiland is reportedly in critical condition after a suicide attempt due to the stress of not only the crime but from so many people not believing her. What angers me is the fact that Ms. Eiland was driven to that. It's sad that I'm even writing this piece but we in the black community need to take care of our own and stop thinking every woman who call rape is out for a payday or lying. This is especially since we're the least likely to get help through news coverage because of our race.
Also please let's not mention the cases of Chris Brown & Nelly because not only are those isolated cases, it's not the factor for everyone. Both were under suspicion for rapes where the victims recanted. However in the case of R. Kelly, whether you believe the victims or not there is hard evidence against him and a long history of sexual deviancy.
We need to do better people!